Nails and Nailing.

So, anyway, there I was on the tube minding my own business, playing Monopoly on my iPod and listening to The Trap Sodcast. iPod's are g...

Bag of Shit.

Fucking hell. How depressing is a trip to HMV these days? A new HMV has just opened in Lewisham (it will close soon) and not only does it re...

STEPHEN!

I've been in horrible sticky situations on stage before. It's hard to avoid when you have my "material". On Saturday night...

Give Over.

Saving the world is never going to be easy. It's tough. You have to suffer through a lot if you want to see proper change taking place o...

Dogs of War.

The drunks of Lewisham just get classier. Although I haven't seen Nick the Homeless Man ever since he threw a can at my head and then as...

Los Quattros Cvnts!

What a lot of fun the last couple of days have been. Los Quattros Cvnts made their debut at The Phoenix on Tuesday and Wednesday and I'm...

Blind, Stupid and Pointless.

I thought I was actually going to be able to beat the Girl in a wheelchair story yesterday as I stood at Kings Cross train station watching ...

Wheely Awful.

I don't want to keep going on about this but I'm just so touched by the gesture that I'm not quite over it yet. My (tiny) illnes...

Save Michael.

I'm feeling a lot better now. And that's bad. As much as I don't like being ill, what goes along with being ill is fantastic. Pi...

Sick Note.

It's crap being ill. No energy to do anything and everything is annoying or hard to do. I've been trying my best to pretend there...

Come On.

DEAREST BLOGGER-USER, I'VE BEEN TOLD THAT THERE IS A SCROLLING PROBLEM WITH MY BLOG. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE TROUBLE READING THIS...

Out Of My Mind.

Let's begin with how stupid I am. It's getting worse. Not knowing how insects procreate is one thing but on Thursday night I hosted ...

Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey.

For all those concerned, Jerk was great yesterday. There were so many fireworks that she stopped hearing them after a while. Of course, she ...

Fawkes Off.

I don't like today. November the 5th is always a shit day, especially the last four of them. It should be good. You should be lighting s...

The Joy of Joy.

Life is beautiful. Not the fucking shitty existence thing that we have to drag ourselves through every pitiful day until the warm, welcoming...

Talking Crap.

Why did Jerk have to shit on the living room floor the night that Robin Ince came round? Robin coming to stay is the equivalent of the Vicar...

Fairtrade Mocha Is Wasted On The Young.

Why the fuck are children ordering latte's in Starbucks? Yesterday, I saw a group of girls, aged I'm sure no more than 13, ordering ...

I'm The Best Thing.

How could I have forgotten this? The answer is booze. On Wednesday night, right after London Comedy Improv, I headed home on the late night ...